• There were many reasons for the change of the site software, the biggest was security. The age of the old software also meant no server updates for certain programs. There are many benefits to the new software, one of the biggest is the mobile functionality. Ill fix up some stuff in the coming days, we'll also try to get some of the old addons back or the data imported back into the site like the garage. To create a thread or to reply with a post is basically the same as it was in the prior software. The default style of the site is light colored, but i temporarily added a darker colored style, to change you can find a link at the bottom of the site.

Missing---Joke Forum, so I'll just start a thread.

A motorcycle is in with his cardiologist; getting his ticker checked out...
"Hey Doc... How come you make so much money, and I make so little? We're both basically working on nothing but pumps." He asks.
"True.", says the Sawbones, "But when I'm working on one; it's still running!"
 
Bob decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend.

One evening, after the honeymoon, he was assembling some loads for an upcoming hunt.

His wife was standing there at his bench watching him. After a long period of silence she finally speaks.

"Honey, I've been thinking, now that we are married, I think it's time you quit hunting, shooting, hand loading, and fishing.

Maybe you should sell your guns and boat".

Bob gets this horrified look on his face.

She says, "Darling, what's wrong?"

There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife.

EX-wife!", she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!"

I wasn't.



(Well at least she didn't include the golf clubs)

 
:shocked: That one wasn't funny... It was SCARY!
36_11_1.gif


:roflblack::roflblack: :clap:
 
driving in Alberta Canada Blizzard

When Lena got off work up there at Lake Woebegone, it was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to get home.

She sat in the car while it warmed up and thought about her situation. She remembered Bill's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard, she should wait for a snowplough to come by and follow it. That way she would not have to worry about going off the road or getting stuck in a snow drift.

Sure enough, in a little while, a snowplough went by and she pulled out and began to follow it. As she followed along behind the snowplough, she felt quite comfortable and smug as they continued on their way and she was not having any problem with the blizzard or road conditions.

After some time had passed, she was somewhat surprised when the snowplough stopped. The driver got out of the cab and came back to her car. He signalled her to roll down her window and asked if she was all right, as she had been following him for a long time.

Lena said she was fine and told him of her husbands advice to follow a plough when caught in a blizzard.

The driver replied it was okay with him and that she could continue to follow him if she wanted, ... But he wanted her to know that he was done with the Wal-Mart parking lot and was going over to Canadian Tire next.


 
Always wear clean underwear in public


From the Daily News comes this story of a Leicester couple.......... who drove their car to ASDA, only to have their car break down in the car park.

The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car.


The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of hairy legs protruding from under the chassis. Unfortunately, although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned his private parts into glaringly public ones..

Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place.

On regaining her feet, she looked across the bonnet and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by watching.

The AA mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.






 
Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?
To get to the same side.

A neutron walks into a bar. "How much for a beer", he asks. " For you.. . No charge"
Bada daaa bom bom.
Courtesy- Sheldon Cooper.


Phil, Tyler TX- from my iPad3.5 using Tapatalk HD
 
Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?
To get to the same side.

A neutron walks into a bar. "How much for a beer", he asks. " For you.. . No charge"
Bada daaa bom bom.
Courtesy- Sheldon Cooper.


Phil, Tyler TX- from my iPad3.5 using Tapatalk HD

Even Penny grimaced at those. :yikes:
 
The wife's back on the warpath again. She was up for making a sex movie last night, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.

I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles. My next crap could spell disaster.

I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.

After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the wife were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, “Screw it, soldier on!”

I woke up this morning at 8, and could smell something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn’t know what to do. Then I remembered McDonald’s serves breakfast until 11:30.

Bought the wife a hamster skin coat last week. Took her to the fair last night, and it took me 3 hours to get her off the Ferris wheel.

The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"

My wife packed my bags, and as I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!"
"Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"

A government survey has shown that 91% of illegal immigrants come to this country so that they can see their own doctor.
 
The wooden Ball

An old man walks into the barbershop for shave and a haircut, but he tells the barber he can't get all his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age.

The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells him to put it inside his cheek to spread out the skin.

When he's finished, the old man tells the barber that was the cleanest shave he's had in years, but he wanted to know what would have happened if he had swallowed that little ball.

The barber replied, "Just bring it back in a couple of days like everyone else does."
 
Hey fellas, all joking aside for a minute, I would like to share a personal experience with my family &
friends about drinking and driving. As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a "social session" out with friends. Well three days ago I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather ...nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit. That's when I did something that I've never done before - I took a cab home.

Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident. This was a real surprise as I had never driven a cab before, I don't know where I got it and
now that it's in my garage. I don't know what to do with it….............any suggestions?
 
For hunters only...lol

A 65 year old guy is at the doctor doing his annual check up. When the doctor asks how he feels he answers: "I have never felt better. My girlfriend is 18 years old and she is expecting my child, not bad hah?" The doctor paused for a moment and said: "Let me tell you a story: I know a hunter that never misses a hunting opportunity. But one day he mistakenly attached his umbrella to his backpack instead of his rifle. When he reached the forest he was suddenly confronted by a bear. He removed the umbrella from the backpack, aimed at the bear and fired. The bear dropped to the ground and was dead." "Ha, ha, ha...that's impossible" laughed the old guy. "Another hunter must have fired the shot." "My words exactly" said the doctor.
 
The ultimate ethnic joke

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, an Iranian, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Syrian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Canadian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 2 Africans, walk into a very fine restaurant.
After scrutinizing the group the Maitre D says "I'm sorry......
You can't dine here without a Thai. "
 
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