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There were many reasons for the change of the site software, the biggest was security. The age of the old software also meant no server updates for certain programs. There are many benefits to the new software, one of the biggest is the mobile functionality. Ill fix up some stuff in the coming days, we'll also try to get some of the old addons back or the data imported back into the site like the garage. To create a thread or to reply with a post is basically the same as it was in the prior software. The default style of the site is light colored, but i temporarily added a darker colored style, to change you can find a link at the bottom of the site.
Missing---Joke Forum, so I'll just start a thread.
- Thread starter ThreeWheels
- Start date
SpyderConvert
Member
Doctor Visit
During her physical examination, a doctor asked a retired woman about her physical activity level.
The woman said she spent 3 days a week, every week in the outdoors.
"Well, yesterday afternoon was typical; I took a five hour walk about 7 miles through some pretty rough terrain.
I waded along the edge of a lake. I pushed my way through 2 miles of brambles. I got sand in my shoes and my eyes.
I barely avoided stepping on a snake. I climbed several rocky hills. I went to the bathroom behind some big trees.
I ran away from an irate mother bear and then ran away from one angry bull Elk. The mental stress of it all left me shattered.
At the end of it all I drank a scotch and three glasses of wine.
Amazed by the story, the doctor said, "You must be one hell of an outdoor woman!"
"No," the woman replied, "I'm just a really, really horrible golfer".
During her physical examination, a doctor asked a retired woman about her physical activity level.
The woman said she spent 3 days a week, every week in the outdoors.
"Well, yesterday afternoon was typical; I took a five hour walk about 7 miles through some pretty rough terrain.
I waded along the edge of a lake. I pushed my way through 2 miles of brambles. I got sand in my shoes and my eyes.
I barely avoided stepping on a snake. I climbed several rocky hills. I went to the bathroom behind some big trees.
I ran away from an irate mother bear and then ran away from one angry bull Elk. The mental stress of it all left me shattered.
At the end of it all I drank a scotch and three glasses of wine.
Amazed by the story, the doctor said, "You must be one hell of an outdoor woman!"
"No," the woman replied, "I'm just a really, really horrible golfer".
SpyderConvert
Member
What A Surprise
Bob Denman
New member
Arion
Active member
Yet Another Bit of HUmor
An elderly Pennsylvania Amish gentlemandecided to take his wife and children to the big city as a once in a lifetimetreat. Arriving in Philadelphia and were astounded because they had never beento a large city before. They checked into their downtown hotel and were standingby the elevator, which they also had never seen before, waiting for the mother whowas visiting a gift shop in the lobby.
The elevator door opened, an elderlywoman entered, and the door closed. In a few moments the door openedagain and a beautiful young woman stepped out. Another older woman thenstepped in. Again the door opened a few minutes later and another youngattractive woman stepped out. The old Amish gentleman turned to his sonand said, “Go get your mother.”
An elderly Pennsylvania Amish gentlemandecided to take his wife and children to the big city as a once in a lifetimetreat. Arriving in Philadelphia and were astounded because they had never beento a large city before. They checked into their downtown hotel and were standingby the elevator, which they also had never seen before, waiting for the mother whowas visiting a gift shop in the lobby.
The elevator door opened, an elderlywoman entered, and the door closed. In a few moments the door openedagain and a beautiful young woman stepped out. Another older woman thenstepped in. Again the door opened a few minutes later and another youngattractive woman stepped out. The old Amish gentleman turned to his sonand said, “Go get your mother.”
ottawa-rider
Member
IdahoMtnSpyder
Active member
My wife was telling a neighbor lady years ago about a boy and girl set of twins she was baby sitting. The neighbor asked, "Are they identical twins?"
Bob Denman
New member
Bob Denman
New member
An interesting fish story.
The rain had stopped and there was a large puddle just outside the door to the American Legion hall.
A rumpled old Navy Chief was standing near the edge with a fishing line in the puddle. A curious young Marine fighter pilot came over to him and asked what he was doing.
"Fishing," the old Chief simply said. "Poor old chief," the Marine officer thought to himself and invited the old Navy Chief into the bar for a drink.
As he felt he should start a conversation while they were sipping their spirits, the young jet pilot winked at another pilot and asked the Chief, "How many have you caught today?"
"You're number 14," the old Chief answered, taking another sip from his double shot of 12-year-old Scotch, "2 Air Force, 3 Army and 9 Marines."
A rumpled old Navy Chief was standing near the edge with a fishing line in the puddle. A curious young Marine fighter pilot came over to him and asked what he was doing.
"Fishing," the old Chief simply said. "Poor old chief," the Marine officer thought to himself and invited the old Navy Chief into the bar for a drink.
As he felt he should start a conversation while they were sipping their spirits, the young jet pilot winked at another pilot and asked the Chief, "How many have you caught today?"
"You're number 14," the old Chief answered, taking another sip from his double shot of 12-year-old Scotch, "2 Air Force, 3 Army and 9 Marines."
Bob Denman
New member
I was sitting at a long stop light yesterday, thinking about what I
could do to keep busy during retirement, minding my own business and patiently waiting for the light to turn green, even though there was no on-coming traffic.
An old Nissan full of bearded, young, loud Muslims, shouting anti-American
slogans, with a half-burned American Flag duct-taped on the trunk of their
car and a “Remember 9-11” slogan spray painted on the side, stopped next
to me.
Suddenly they yelled, "Allah Akbar! Praise Allah! Death to America”
and took off before the light changed. Out of nowhere an 18-wheeler truck
came speeding through the intersection and ran directly over their car,
crushing it completely and killing everyone in it.
:shocked:
For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself,
" Man!.....that could have been me!”
So today, bright and early, I went out and got a job as a truck driver!
could do to keep busy during retirement, minding my own business and patiently waiting for the light to turn green, even though there was no on-coming traffic.
An old Nissan full of bearded, young, loud Muslims, shouting anti-American
slogans, with a half-burned American Flag duct-taped on the trunk of their
car and a “Remember 9-11” slogan spray painted on the side, stopped next
to me.
Suddenly they yelled, "Allah Akbar! Praise Allah! Death to America”
and took off before the light changed. Out of nowhere an 18-wheeler truck
came speeding through the intersection and ran directly over their car,
crushing it completely and killing everyone in it.
:shocked:
For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself,
" Man!.....that could have been me!”
So today, bright and early, I went out and got a job as a truck driver!
kep-up
New member
That ain't politically correct! Naughty, Naughty:yes:
Bob Denman
New member
I know! :yes:
hyea::yes:But since I posted it in the Jokes Forum: I sort of figured that most folks would know what it was supposed to be... :joke::joke::joke:
kep-up
New member
And for my wife, a crowbar!:banghead:
Bob Denman
New member
It can also be used as a mirror for shaving...
...and for signallying the helicopters; when you get lost in the woods! :shocked: :roflblack:
...and for signallying the helicopters; when you get lost in the woods! :shocked: :roflblack:
Lew L
Well-known member
kep-up
New member
vided
New member
A couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's father.
He asked if they were interested. Both said they were very much in favor of it.
The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.
But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch.
The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer The husband was still feeling fine.
The doctor then checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing.
At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well.
Since the pain transfer was obviously helping the wife considerably the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him.
The wife subsequently delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain and the husband continued to experience no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic.
When they got home they found the mailman dead on the porch.
He asked if they were interested. Both said they were very much in favor of it.
The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.
But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch.
The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer The husband was still feeling fine.
The doctor then checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing.
At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well.
Since the pain transfer was obviously helping the wife considerably the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him.
The wife subsequently delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain and the husband continued to experience no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic.
When they got home they found the mailman dead on the porch.
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