Hang in there girl. Life will get better. I would be greatly surprised if some other people didn't get fed up and leave the Spyder for good. That is sad! People can't help how they are wired, and how their experience and confidence will make them react to situations like this. Personally, after a lifetime of riding Brit bikes, leaking Harleys, Indians with no dealers, etc., and working on all this junk incessantly just to go 100 miles once in a while, I have a way to go before I become frustrated enough to quit or to let the dealer keep my $1,000 RT deposit. The time could come, though. I can't say it hasn't crossed my mind.
I don't think BRP's response is any different than most manufacturers, but sooner or later they have to step up to the plate. I hope for everyone's sake that the time for that is real soon. Meanwhile, I'm afraid they will continue to lose old and new customers alike. When someone who was as enthusiastic about the Spyder as you were at first blush, becomes wary and disgusted, there is a problem...no matter whether it is real or imagined, actually experienced or not. As they say, "The perception of a problem is a problem." I hope you find a way to cheer up soon. Still worried about ya.