JerryB
New member
Hi out there in SpyderLand,
After stumbling upon a lamp in his cellar, an old man tries to clean it and is astonished when a genie appears and grants him one wish.
The pensioner thinks hard, then unselfishly decides that a bridge across the Atlantic Ocean would help humanity more than any petty personal gain.
"Hmmm," says the genie, "I think that's beyond even my powers.It's an engineering nightmare, its a logistical nightmare, there are even socio-economic issues involved. Could you please choose again?"
The old man thinks for a moment and then asks if just once, possibly, he could understand how women think.
The genie looks at him coldly. "Okay," he says, "Would you like 4 lanes or 6"?
***************************
The Pope goes to New York.
He is picked up at the airport by a limousine.
He looks at the beautiful car and says to thedriver, "You know, I hardly ever get to drive. Would you please letme?"
The driver is understandably hesistant and says,"I'm sorry, but I don't think I'm supposed to do that."
But the Pope persists, "Please?"
The driver finally lets up. "Oh, all right, I can't really say no to the Pope."
So the Pope takes the wheel, and boy, is he a speed demon! He hits the gas and goes about 100 mph in a 45 zone.
A policeman notices and pulls him over. The cop walks up and asks the Pope to roll down the window. Startled and surprised, the young officer asks the Pope to wait a minute. He goes back to his patrol car and radios the chief.
Cop: Chief, I have a problem.
Chief: What sort of problem?
Cop: Well, you see, I pulled over this guy for driving way over the speed limit but it's someone really important.
Chief: Important, like the mayor?
Cop: No, no, much more important than that.
Chief: Important, like the governor?
Cop: Wayyyyyy more important than that.
Chief: Like, the president?
Cop: More.
Chief: Who's more important than the president?
Cop: I don't know, but he's got the Pope driving for him
:yes:
Jerry Baumchen
After stumbling upon a lamp in his cellar, an old man tries to clean it and is astonished when a genie appears and grants him one wish.
The pensioner thinks hard, then unselfishly decides that a bridge across the Atlantic Ocean would help humanity more than any petty personal gain.
"Hmmm," says the genie, "I think that's beyond even my powers.It's an engineering nightmare, its a logistical nightmare, there are even socio-economic issues involved. Could you please choose again?"
The old man thinks for a moment and then asks if just once, possibly, he could understand how women think.
The genie looks at him coldly. "Okay," he says, "Would you like 4 lanes or 6"?
***************************
The Pope goes to New York.
He is picked up at the airport by a limousine.
He looks at the beautiful car and says to thedriver, "You know, I hardly ever get to drive. Would you please letme?"
The driver is understandably hesistant and says,"I'm sorry, but I don't think I'm supposed to do that."
But the Pope persists, "Please?"
The driver finally lets up. "Oh, all right, I can't really say no to the Pope."
So the Pope takes the wheel, and boy, is he a speed demon! He hits the gas and goes about 100 mph in a 45 zone.
A policeman notices and pulls him over. The cop walks up and asks the Pope to roll down the window. Startled and surprised, the young officer asks the Pope to wait a minute. He goes back to his patrol car and radios the chief.
Cop: Chief, I have a problem.
Chief: What sort of problem?
Cop: Well, you see, I pulled over this guy for driving way over the speed limit but it's someone really important.
Chief: Important, like the mayor?
Cop: No, no, much more important than that.
Chief: Important, like the governor?
Cop: Wayyyyyy more important than that.
Chief: Like, the president?
Cop: More.
Chief: Who's more important than the president?
Cop: I don't know, but he's got the Pope driving for him
:yes:
Jerry Baumchen