What's the matter with UtahPete?

[UtahPete]

I've received quite a bit of criticism over the years. Some of it I understood and some I didn't think was justified. What is common with all those critical posts is that they clutter up otherwise useful threads by devolving into something off-topic.

So, I thought I'd start an off-topic thread where anyone feeling particularly upset by something I've posted can let me know that without taking the original thread off-topic.

I'm actually quite appreciative of critical feedback given in the spirit of kindness. Not so much with the nasty criticism, but I recognize that behind those reactions lies some possibly useful feedback about the way I am coming across to people.

So, I welcome your comments and, even if they are said in anger or frustration, I will try to respond respectfully. I am hoping this works and doesn't devolve into something the moderators will feel compelled to close. But, let's try it and see what happens.

Flame away.

[Lew L]

Unlike 99.99% of the members here------ I know Pete personally. Have ridden with him through the Sierras. Had lunch with him, his wife, and Pegasus. ( NO food dripping, fire breathing, lightning coming from the horns that are NOT on his head)

Pete is not on my "ignore" list ( as are some others here)

I don't think that a flaming is necessary at all. My V-Max has flames---- because it's just that fast.

Lew L

[canamjhb]

I can't think of anyone on this forum that I totally agree with all the time. But some people are more agreeable than others. And some people seem to have to regularly criticize every little post that is not to their liking. The world is full of positive and negative people and this forum is no different. Now, as for Pete. Well, I hope to have an opportunity to meet him (you) at the Yuma Ryde-in this month. I will report back if I find him (you) to be too short and having lousy taste in music..... ..... Jim

[AnthonyG]

Just a note for everyone, Pete asked about him, so comments in this thread that are not related to Petes question will be removed, thats where you post went 2dogs, in case you are wondering, you posting about other users, isnt what this thread is about.

I gave directions to the mods to let this post fly, so no Pete it wont get closed.

[easysuper]

I was really looking forward to meeting Pete at the Yuma ride but my work got in the way. When I first started reading his posts it took me awhile to figure out that he was only saying what he thought and was not being mean or disrespectful. I appreciate a man who can just say what he's thinking and not worry about what someone with thin skin thinks. This is a guy that has gone to a lot of trouble and work to put together a ride so we can enjoy what we like to do. Hope we can meet someday Pete.

[UtahPete]

I was really looking forward to meeting Pete at the Yuma ride but my work got in the way. When I first started reading his posts it took me awhile to figure out that he was only saying what he thought and was not being mean or disrespectful. I appreciate a man who can just say what he's thinking and not worry about what someone with thin skin thinks. This is a guy that has gone to a lot of trouble and work to put together a ride so we can enjoy what we like to do. Hope we can meet someday Pete.

We will. Even if I have to ride up to Oregon. Actually, we were planning a NW tour this past summer, but it didn't happen. So, try again this summer.

[SpyderAnn01]

You asked questions today that, if they had been posted by others you would have flamed them. You were getting back a little of what you normally give and I guess you don’t like it.

[Chasinsparks]

Pete

I have no dog in this fight. However in my personal opinion, I have seen some of your post and though I do not personally feel they are in bad taste so to speak I feel many people do not know how to handle the text. When we speak to someone face to face we can clearly see the emotion and the facial expression that allows us to make a decision on what the person is trying to convey, be it happy, angry, sarcastic etc.

It is hard to show the emotion in text, and sometimes me included
people misunderstand the writers intent. Just my .02

[UtahPete]

Pete, I have no dog in this fight. However in my personal opinion, I have seen some of your post and though I do not personally feel they are in bad taste so to speak I feel many people do not know how to handle the text. When we speak to someone face to face we can clearly see the emotion and the facial expression that allows us to make a decision on what the person is trying to convey, be it happy, angry, sarcastic etc. It is hard to show the emotion in text and sometimes, me included, people misunderstand the writers intent. Just my .02

I think that's why folks use emojis (sometimes misleadingly) with non-verbal communication.

[PMK]

SpyderAnn stated it. Myself, having read the replies you offer others certainly is not in the spirit of good will and helping. Maybe not every reply, but many of your replies.

As Ann explained, an oppertunity presented itself, allowing a chance to hold a mirror to your face. Right or wrong, maybe that became part of your reason for this topic.

I am not indicating or stating you are a bad person nor an angel. Merely, I became frustrated seeing your meaningless post do what you are claiming not to want, diluting the topics effectiveness. Your near constant barrage of telling folks to search or get back on topic in the quantity you are known to do, is simply rude.

Spyders and many Spyder owners are a fun group. Not a one of us is perfect or without fault or making mistakes. You are certainly not the internet mall cop with full power to advise people about moving a topic to another section.

People are who they are, I am who I am, and you Pete are you. The chances of this topic solving any of what goes on seems slim to nil, whether it be you or one of us.

Yesterday or the day before, I did something I never enjoy doing, I added you to my Ignore List. Without doubt, my name fills many ignore lists, so consider that you may be in good company. However, almost always, for me on Spyderlovers, if you made my Ignore List, I decided that most of what you post is worthless fluff, and with that if I decide to read it, I can.

All the best with your event and more, maybe someday we shall meet face to face and enjoy that time together.

[UtahPete]

You asked questions today that, if they had been posted by others you would have flamed them. You were getting back a little of what you normally give and I guess you don’t like it.

It's not that I don't like it, Ann. It's that I don't understand it.

Either I don't understand what they are saying, or I don't understand what it was I said that folks object to so strongly. I know there have been times, usually in off-topic but not always, that I was responding emotionally to something, and I deserved rebuke for my response.

But, I truly don't understand what most folks (including you) are upset with me for. I cannot for the life of me figure out what it is I've done or said that has caused your antagonism toward me. And, you know that I have attempted to speak with you in private about it.

[UtahPete]

SpyderAnn stated it. Myself, having read the replies you offer others certainly is not in the spirit of good will and helping. Maybe not every reply, but many of your replies.

As Ann explained, an oppertunity presented itself, allowing a chance to hold a mirror to your face. Right or wrong, maybe that became part of your reason for this topic.

I am not indicating or stating you are a bad person nor an angel. Merely, I became frustrated seeing your meaningless post do what you are claiming not to want, diluting the topics effectiveness. Your near constant barrage of telling folks to search or get back on topic in the quantity you are known to do, is simply rude.

Spyders and many Spyder owners are a fun group. Not a one of us is perfect or without fault or making mistakes. You are certainly not the internet mall cop with full power to advise people about moving a topic to another section.

People are who they are, I am who I am, and you Pete are you. The chances of this topic solving any of what goes on seems slim to nil, whether it be you or one of us.

Yesterday or the day before, I did something I never enjoy doing, I added you to my Ignore List. Without doubt, my name fills many ignore lists, so consider that you may be in good company. However, almost always, for me on Spyderlovers, if you made my Ignore List, I decided that most of what you post is worthless fluff, and with that if I decide to read it, I can.

All the best with your event and more, maybe someday we shall meet face to face and enjoy that time together.

Thanks, PMK. I appreciate your candor. Some of it I'm sure is just my personality. I'm very direct and unfiltered in my comments - it rubs some folks the wrong way. But, I'll try to be more sensitive to the tone and purpose of my posts in the future.

[UtahPete]

You like the Diesel Canyon? I have the 3.6 Non Denali

Somebody's going to criticize me for taking this off-off-topic, but yes, we love the Diesel Canyon. Funny story, I wanted a diesel pickup truck and I knew my wife didn't like either diesels or pickups. So, I made an appointment to drive the top-of-the-line Denali diesel short-bed, because I was hoping the interior and high-tech stuff would help win her over. When I got to the dealer with her, I saw it was a red truck and I knew she 'hated' red. But, we were there after driving an hour through a driving rainstorm last fall, so we took a test-drive and I insisted Jane drive it first. I told her - honey if you really hate it after driving it, I'll forget the whole thing. Short story is she got over her distaste for pickup trucks AND even grudgingly acknowledged that it was a 'pretty red color'. Then I told her she'd been driving a diesel and her jaw fell to the floor - it is so quiet and smooth and clean she had no idea. So, we bought it.

I should have known it would end this way. When I came home one day 10 years ago with a motorcycle, she looked in horror at it and said she had no idea I liked motorcycles. She certainly didn't and had told her 2 boys they could never have one. Long story short, she came to like riding behind me on the bike. She really liked the Spyder and fully endorsed me getting one. A year ago, she wanted her own (that's the Cognac one I bought off someone here on SL down in Alabam).

[safecracker]

I enjoy your threads. I disagree with you on politics and second amendment. Bruce

[UtahPete]

I enjoy your threads. I disagree with you on politics and second amendment. Bruce

I always learn something when debating with someone of an opposing point of view. Mutual respect of others is the lifeblood of our democracy, I believe.

But, I digress....

What the heck do you mean, you disagree with me? What's wrong with you anyway?

[wyliec]

I remember a similar post where you mentioned that you have this habit of rubbing people the wrong way, and you were going to change. You have changed, but in the wrong direction. Here, are you looking for one of these........MEA CULPA. Sorry, if you are going to ask the date of the post I am referring to, I don't have it.

I just noticed something. I do agree with your politics and the second ammendment stance.

[UtahPete]

I remember a similar post where you mentioned that you have this habit of rubbing people the wrong way, and you were going to change. You have changed, but in the wrong direction. Here, are you looking for one of these........MEA CULPA. Sorry, if you are going to ask the date of the post I am referring to, I don't have it.

I apologize. I'll keep trying.

[al0vely]

I blocked you a few weeks ago - fairly abrasive in your posts often when I did the block. I often wondered how many new members to the group quickly left the group with the responses they received from yourself and a couple of other frequent posters. I guess the responses yesterday made you stop and think about some things when you got what you give to others. Who knows maybe this thread will make you kinder and gentler ... but maybe not.

[UtahPete]

I blocked you a few weeks ago - fairly abrasive in your posts often when I did the block. I often wondered how many new members to the group quickly left the group with the responses they received from yourself and a couple of other frequent posters. I guess the responses yesterday made you stop and think about some things when you got what you give to others. Who knows maybe this thread will make you kinder and gentler ... but maybe not.

I wish I knew what specifically you found so offensive. Then, I could meaningfully address your concern. But, thanks anyway for your candor.

[Chupaca]

You'll get nothing from me... live and let live and if you won't I'm down the road....

[Pirate looks at --]

Unlike 99.99% of the members here------ I know Pete personally. Have ridden with him through the Sierras. Had lunch with him, his wife, and Pegasus. ( NO food dripping, fire breathing, lightning coming from the horns that are NOT on his head)

Pete is not on my "ignore" list ( as are some others here)

I don't think that a flaming is necessary at all. My V-Max has flames---- because it's just that fast.

Lew L

I agree with you Lew!! After meeting Pete at the Nor-Cal Rally in 2017 and ryding with him over Ebbetts Pass, I got to know him and understand that he is a really decent fellow. He's even fun to be around! There are times when I think Pete seeks to "poke the bear" when it may not be necessary, but even that can be fun to read. I don't think he has a mean bone in his body. He just believes what he believes, and good for him on that note! Hope to see you soon Pete!

[PrairieSpyder]

I've received quite a bit of criticism over the years. Some of it I understood and some I didn't think was justified. What is common with all those critical posts is that they clutter up otherwise useful threads by devolving into something off-topic.

So, I thought I'd start an off-topic thread where anyone feeling particularly upset by something I've posted can let me know that without taking the original thread off-topic.

I'm actually quite appreciative of critical feedback given in the spirit of kindness. Not so much with the nasty criticism, but I recognize that behind those reactions lies some possibly useful feedback about the way I am coming across to people.

So, I welcome your comments and, even if they are said in anger or frustration, I will try to respond respectfully. I am hoping this works and doesn't devolve into something the moderators will feel compelled to close. But, let's try it and see what happens.

Flame away.

Pete, at one time it seemed to me that most of your posts were designed to be provocative (at best) or mean. If it had been just now and then, it wouldn't have bothered me. So I put you on my ignore list for a while. But I have since seen a marked improvement. I take this thread as a heartfelt wish to learn and change. Good for you.

[UtahPete]

Pete, at one time it seemed to me that most of your posts were designed to be provocative (at best) or mean. If it had been just now and then, it wouldn't have bothered me. So I put you on my ignore list for a while. But I have since seen a marked improvement. I take this thread as a heartfelt wish to learn and change. Good for you.

Patti, I like that you noticed a change in the way I come across on this forum. I think I'm the same person underneath but I've made a concerted effort to be more restrained and less brittle with my communications and more aware of how it may be received by others.

[SpyderAnn01]

Patti, I like that you noticed a change in the way I come across on this forum. I think I'm the same person underneath but I've made a concerted effort to be more restrained and less brittle with my communications and more aware of how it may be received by others.

Pete you tell this to Patti so you are aware of how abrasive your posts are, yet you act like you have no idea why it pisses me or anyone else off. Go back and read your old posts, especially the ones where new people to the forum ask questions and you bluntly tell them that they’ve posted in the wrong forum, asked a question that’s already been answered and you will see that you come off as a bully.

[UtahPete]

Pete you tell this to Patti so you are aware of how abrasive your posts are, yet you act like you have no idea why it pisses me or anyone else off. Go back and read your old posts, especially the ones where new people to the forum ask questions and you bluntly tell them that they’ve posted in the wrong forum, asked a question that’s already been answered and you will see that you come off as a bully.

Ann, I can understand why you say that. So, am I forever going to be perceived that way?