PDA

View Full Version : LOUISIANA DECLARES WAR ON U.S. GOVERNMENT



PrairieSpyder
12-16-2013, 09:37 AM
President Barack ***** was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang. "Hello, President *****" a heavily
accented southern voice said. "This is John Boy, down here at Cheneier Catfish Shack, in Louisiana , near
Bawcomville, and I am callin' to tell ya'll that we are officially declaring war on y'all!"


"Well John Boy," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"


"Right now," said John Boy, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Tom, my next-door-neighbor
and brother Gerald, and the whole dart team from JD's Bait Shop. That makes eight or maybe nine depending if
Bump can close the store.


Barack paused. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."


"Wow," said John Boy. "I'll have to call ya back!"


Sure enough, the next day, John Boy called again. "Mr. *****, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire
some infantry equipment!"


"And what equipment would that be John Boy?" Barack asked.


"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and my brother Mike's farm tractor."


President ***** sighed. "I must tell you John Boy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."


"Lord above", said John Boy, "I'll be getting back to ya."


Sure enough, John Boy called again the next day. "President *****! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had
to call off this here war."


"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"


Well, sir," said John Boy, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, catfish, greens and pie
and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed that many prisoners."




SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN

Bob Denman
12-16-2013, 10:01 AM
:clap: :roflblack:
"These colors never run!" :2thumbs:

Cruzr Joe
12-16-2013, 10:11 AM
The South shall rise again, take note you Yankee's

(Cruzr Joe, Born in Brooklyn N.Y. a long time ago, Currenly residing in The Great State of Arkansas, and sometime in the State Hospital)

Cruzr Joe

Bob Denman
12-16-2013, 10:22 AM
80683

Dan McNally
12-16-2013, 10:30 AM
The South shall rise again, take note you Yankee's

(Cruzr Joe, Born in Brooklyn N.Y. a long time ago, Currenly residing in The Great State of Arkansas, and sometime in the State Hospital)

Cruzr Joe

Don't make me have to send my son down there! 8068580684

Bob Denman
12-16-2013, 10:42 AM
You may have heard on the news about a southern California man put
under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100
... guns and allegedly had (by rough estimate) 100,000 rounds of
ammunition stored in his home.
The house also featured a secret escape tunnel.
My favorite quote from the dimwit television reporter: "Wow! He has
about a quarter million machine gun bullets."
The headline referred to it as a "massive weapons cache!"
By southern California standards someone owning 100,000 rounds would
be called "mentally unstable." Just imagine if he lived elsewhere:
In Arizona, he'd be called "an avid gun collector."
In Arkansas, he'd be called "a novice gun collector."
In Utah, he'd be called "moderately well prepared," but they'd
probably reserve judgment until they made sure that he had a
corresponding quantity of stored food
In Tennessee and Virginia, he'd be called "the neighborhood 'Go-To' guy."
In Alabama, he'd be called "a likely gubernatorial candidate."
In Louisiana, he'd be called "an eligible bachelor."
In North Carolina, Mississippi and Texas he would be called "
a deer hunting buddy."
And in Georgia, he's just "Bubba" who's a little short on ammo.

Dan McNally
12-16-2013, 10:47 AM
You may have heard on the news about a southern California man put
under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100
... guns and allegedly had (by rough estimate) 100,000 rounds of
ammunition stored in his home.
The house also featured a secret escape tunnel.
My favorite quote from the dimwit television reporter: "Wow! He has
about a quarter million machine gun bullets."
The headline referred to it as a "massive weapons cache!"
By southern California standards someone owning 100,000 rounds would
be called "mentally unstable." Just imagine if he lived elsewhere:
In Arizona, he'd be called "an avid gun collector."
In Arkansas, he'd be called "a novice gun collector."
In Utah, he'd be called "moderately well prepared," but they'd
probably reserve judgment until they made sure that he had a
corresponding quantity of stored food
In Tennessee and Virginia, he'd be called "the neighborhood 'Go-To' guy."
In Alabama, he'd be called "a likely gubernatorial candidate."
In Louisiana, he'd be called "an eligible bachelor."
In North Carolina, Mississippi and Texas he would be called "
a deer hunting buddy."
And in Georgia, he's just "Bubba" who's a little short on ammo.

I'm not sure, but I think its a misdemeanor in West Virginia to not have at least 1,000 rounds for every gun you have . . . I'd better not move to California!

Bob Denman
12-16-2013, 11:09 AM
It is!
I think that they chain you to your loader; and tell you to "get busy"! :D

ironbuttdean
12-16-2013, 12:01 PM
Gotta have priorities to live in Georgia.


You may have heard on the news about a southern California man put
under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100
... guns and allegedly had (by rough estimate) 100,000 rounds of
ammunition stored in his home.
The house also featured a secret escape tunnel.
My favorite quote from the dimwit television reporter: "Wow! He has
about a quarter million machine gun bullets."
The headline referred to it as a "massive weapons cache!"
By southern California standards someone owning 100,000 rounds would
be called "mentally unstable." Just imagine if he lived elsewhere:
In Arizona, he'd be called "an avid gun collector."
In Arkansas, he'd be called "a novice gun collector."
In Utah, he'd be called "moderately well prepared," but they'd
probably reserve judgment until they made sure that he had a
corresponding quantity of stored food
In Tennessee and Virginia, he'd be called "the neighborhood 'Go-To' guy."
In Alabama, he'd be called "a likely gubernatorial candidate."
In Louisiana, he'd be called "an eligible bachelor."
In North Carolina, Mississippi and Texas he would be called "
a deer hunting buddy."
And in Georgia, he's just "Bubba" who's a little short on ammo.

Chupaca
12-16-2013, 12:15 PM
see now thats planning ahead..!! :roflblack: like Bob's classification thru the US.....:roflblack:

Sarge707
12-16-2013, 12:36 PM
I Give "John Boy" A Lot of credit for thinking of the Logistics before he "Acted?":yikes: He should get a Promotion!!nojoke

bruiser
12-16-2013, 01:45 PM
80700

This is what flies below my Stars and Stripes. This is the national flag of the Confederacy. The Stars and Bars.

It's funny, but at our weekly breakfast this morning, we were talking about how much ammo we had for our weapons.

Uh oh, I hear helicopter rotors..

jerpinoy
12-16-2013, 01:59 PM
God Bless America and All of us. No other country like it. Majority rules and civilized even in the big house and senate.

"Pens are migther than swords"

ARtraveler
12-16-2013, 02:12 PM
God Bless America and All of us. No other country like it. Majority rules and civilized even in the big house and senate.

"Pens are migther than swords"

:agree: Here, Here.

Oldmanzues
12-16-2013, 03:34 PM
Thank your Son for his service
Oldmanzues

SDM
12-16-2013, 04:51 PM
Save your Dixie Cups!!! The South will rise again!!!:roflblack: