Trickie Dick
03-01-2013, 11:58 PM
Subject: Washington DC Airport Ticket Agent (unbelievable)]
A DC 'airport ticket agent' offers some examples of why the US is in so much trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask
for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by
being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman's (Moore) staffer
(Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town . I started to
explain the length of the flight and the passport information,
and then he interrupted me with, ''I'm not trying to make you
look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts ..''
Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained,
''Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape Town is in South Africa ..''
His response -- click..
3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious
about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the
vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view
room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is
in the middle of the state.
He replied, 'Don't lie to me!, I looked on the map, and Florida
is a very THIN state!!'' (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife (Landra Reid) who asked,
''Is it possible to see England from Canada ?''
I said, ''No.''
She said, ''But they look so close on the map'' (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called
and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas ... I pulled up the
reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas
When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I
heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive
between gates to save time.'' (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week.
She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from
Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.
I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but
she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I
told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ''Do
airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know
whose luggage belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?'
He replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put
a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think
that's very rude!''
After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it.
(I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code
for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline
was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.
8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire
about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost
info, she asked, ''Would it be cheaper to fly to California and
then take the train to Hawaii ?''
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby
Bright from Ala. who asked, ''How do I know which plane to get on?''
I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was
told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have
numbers on them.''
10 Senator Dianne Feinstein called and said, ''I need to fly to
Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little
computer planes?''
I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola and fly on a commuter plane.
She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!''
11 Mary Landrieu , La. Senator, called and had a question about
the documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a
lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she
needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times
and never had to have one of those.''
I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When
I told her this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four times
and every time they have accepted my American Express!''
12 A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make
reservations, ''I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .''
I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure
that's the name of the town?''
'Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the man.
After some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, sir, I've
looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a
Rhino anywhere."
''The man retorted, ''Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where
it is. Check your map!''
So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered,
''You don't mean Buffalo , do you?''
The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.''
Now you know why the Government is in the shape it's in!
Could ANYONE be this DUMB?
A DC 'airport ticket agent' offers some examples of why the US is in so much trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask
for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by
being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman's (Moore) staffer
(Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town . I started to
explain the length of the flight and the passport information,
and then he interrupted me with, ''I'm not trying to make you
look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts ..''
Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained,
''Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape Town is in South Africa ..''
His response -- click..
3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious
about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the
vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view
room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is
in the middle of the state.
He replied, 'Don't lie to me!, I looked on the map, and Florida
is a very THIN state!!'' (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife (Landra Reid) who asked,
''Is it possible to see England from Canada ?''
I said, ''No.''
She said, ''But they look so close on the map'' (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called
and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas ... I pulled up the
reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas
When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I
heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive
between gates to save time.'' (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week.
She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from
Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.
I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but
she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I
told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ''Do
airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know
whose luggage belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?'
He replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put
a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think
that's very rude!''
After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it.
(I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code
for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline
was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.
8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire
about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost
info, she asked, ''Would it be cheaper to fly to California and
then take the train to Hawaii ?''
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby
Bright from Ala. who asked, ''How do I know which plane to get on?''
I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was
told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have
numbers on them.''
10 Senator Dianne Feinstein called and said, ''I need to fly to
Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little
computer planes?''
I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola and fly on a commuter plane.
She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!''
11 Mary Landrieu , La. Senator, called and had a question about
the documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a
lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she
needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times
and never had to have one of those.''
I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When
I told her this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four times
and every time they have accepted my American Express!''
12 A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make
reservations, ''I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .''
I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure
that's the name of the town?''
'Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the man.
After some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, sir, I've
looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a
Rhino anywhere."
''The man retorted, ''Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where
it is. Check your map!''
So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered,
''You don't mean Buffalo , do you?''
The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.''
Now you know why the Government is in the shape it's in!
Could ANYONE be this DUMB?