careful ... joke....

[effgjamis]

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her Husband stalking around with a fly swatter.
>
> "What are you doing?"
> She asked.
>
> "Hunting Flies"
> He responded.
>
> "Oh! Killing any?"
> She asked.
>
> "Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.
>
> Intrigued, she asked.
> "How can you tell them apart?"
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> He responded,
> "3 were on a beer can,
> 2 were on the phone.
>

[ARtraveler]

[SDM]

...and that's when the fight started!

[Chupaca]

that's a good way to tell

[Bob Denman]

imagesCALKPE1X.jpg

[Mexican]

Doctor say he will survive but will always walk with a limp

[Barlock]

A young jackaroo from outback Queensland goes off to University, but halfway through the semester he foolishly has squandered all of his money.

He calls home. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe what modern education is developing. They actually have a program here in Brisbane that will teach our dog Ol' Blue how to talk."

"That's amazing!" his Dad says. "How do I get Ol' Blue in that program?"

"Just send him down here with $2,000," the young jackaroo says,"I'll get him in the course."

So ... his father sends the dog and $2,000.

About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy callshome. "So how's Ol' Blue doing, son?" his father wants to know.

"Awesome! Dad, he's talking up a storm. But you just won't believe this. They've had such good results with talking, they've begun to teach the animals how to read."

"Read?!" exclaims his father. "No kidding! How do we get Ol' Blue in that program?"

"Just send $4,500. I'll get him in the class."

The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk nor read. So he shoots the dog. When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited.

"Where's Ol' Blue? I just can't wait to talk with him, and see him read something!"

"Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ol' Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Financial Review. Then he suddenly turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing around with that little redhead barmaid at the pub?'"

The father groans and whispers, "I hope you shot that bastard before he talks to your Mother!"

"I sure did, Dad!"

"That's my boy!"

The kid went on to be a successful lawyer

[Bob Denman]

[ARtraveler]

Two good ones--